The Lovers: Tsuneko

Details Yozo's first and only love affair with Tsuneko, their suicide pact, and the lasting impact of her death.

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Meeting Tsuneko

The Café Encounter The First Night Yozo went alone to a café on the Ginza and met Tsuneko, a waitress with a Kansai accent. She calmed his agitation without any effort. He felt no need to perform his clowning. The Criminal's Wife Tsuneko told him she was married to a barber who was in prison. She was a kindred spirit, equally isolated and miserable. Yozo felt a rare, deep connection. The Night of Liberation They spent the night together. Yozo felt a liberation and happiness he had never known. He later wrote, "The use of so bold a word will not, I imagine, recur in these notebooks."

The Flight from Love

The Fear of Happiness The Morning After Yozo woke and immediately felt the need to escape. He was afraid of being wounded by happiness. He made a joke about "love flying out the window when poverty comes in the door." The Month Apart He avoided Tsuneko for a month, afraid that meeting her again would lead to a violent rage. His timidity and fear of entanglement kept him away. The Growing Distance Even as he stayed away, the memory of Tsuneko haunted him. He felt a vague sense of regret, but also relief.

The Night of the Kiss

The Cruel Test Horiki's Desire Yozo, drunk, brought Horiki to the café. Horiki announced he wanted to kiss the hostess. Tsuneko sat next to Horiki, and Yozo watched with shock. The Rejection Horiki refused to kiss Tsuneko, calling her "poverty-stricken." Yozo was struck by her wretchedness and felt a surge of pity and love. He drank until he passed out. The Awakening of Love This night, Yozo felt for the first time a positive movement of love in his heart. He realized Tsuneko was the only one he truly loved.

The Suicide Pact

The Decision to Die The Dawn Talk Tsuneko proposed death. Yozo, overwhelmed by his dread of life, agreed. He consented easily, though he still felt an element of make-believe. The Last Walk They spent the morning wandering in Asakusa. When Yozo opened his wallet and found only three copper coins, he felt a humiliation so deep that he knew he could not go on living. The Sea at Kamakura That night, they threw themselves into the sea. Tsuneko died. Yozo was saved. He was the only one he loved, and she was gone.

The Aftermath

The Survivor's Guilt The Hospital Yozo was confined to a hospital. He longed for Tsuneko and wept. He later reflected, "Of all the people I had ever known, that miserable Tsuneko really was the only one I loved." The Police Station He was taken to the police station, but his illness and handsomeness earned him leniency. He was treated as a sick man, not a criminal. The Permanent Scar Tsuneko's death marked Yozo forever. He never again found a love that pure. Her memory was a source of pain and a reminder of his own unworthiness.

autumn, college years

the morning after, and the following month

late November, college

the next morning, and the night of the suicide

after the suicide, in hospital and beyond